CLAUSE 11B EXCLUSIONS

I know that we all need insurance
To me it makes good common sense
It’s just when you read the small print
That all of it turns out pretence

For instance, you are covered for buildings
That burn down completely, entire,
With only one clause that I know of
It must not have been caused through a fire

And what then of floods and of tempest
Well this time you are covered, no doubt
Except if it’s through too much water
But you are safe if the cause is a drought

House contents, well they are no problem
Your Video, Tele and bike
Though not if they are taken by stealing
Extra premium for that if you like

By now you’ll be getting the message
To take out a good policy
Learn Spanish to work out the small print
Or just give up claiming like me

This poem’s not aimed at the brokers
There loyalty’s not what’s on test
They go out of their way to help you
As long as it feathers their nest

If this doesn’t bring me reductions
On future transactions, I fear
I’ll have to delete the last section
And say, “You are not covered my dear”